“I was in excruciating pain the entire time. It left me in extreme pain, I was in agony, when she finally stopped, she took a deep breath and immediately had the conversation with me that it doesn’t seem as if I’m moving along and because the baby showed distress recently, I cannot remember whether this was before the exam or after. After her exam I felt violated, i felt dirty, I felt like I was reliving a rape I had experienced in the past and all the emotions that came with it, I was in pain and next thing I know I hear the doctor say out loud to the nurse “no she’s just not moving along, I EVEN tried to manually break her water and it wouldn’t budge at all, and I tried hard!’“
“Before my discharge from the hospital I had at least three different providers warn me that I'm at a greater risk for postpartum mood disorders because of my traumatic birth experience. It's odd to hear someone else label your birth as traumatic, especially before you realize it for yourself. Where do they think the trauma comes from? The loss of my home birth plan? The prolonged, high intervention induction? The unplanned c-section? The complicated repair with significant blood loss? While not the outcomes I'd wanted, I can make peace with those events because I had the opportunity to make the informed choices that brought me there. Surely they didn't recognize that the greatest source of trauma were the moments where I was stripped of my autonomy, otherwise they should have seized the opportunity to prevent it.“
“During a normally progressing labour at home I said no to a vaginal exam. The attending midwife said I could have a little more time but then she was going to perform it. After my little more time when she advanced toward me saying she was going to do the exam now I again said no and she told me I was not allowed to say no and began threatening that I wouldn't be allowed to keep birthing at home and she was going to call an ambulance to have me removed to the hospital if I kept refusing. I had chosen a home birth to stay out of the hospital due to so many women reporting having pitocin and other medical procedures done to them against their will, but now I was being threatened by this midwife in my home with the same violence I was already trying to avoid.“
“I was suicidal for years, and the way people treated me after the assault is a big factor in that. I attempted suicide about two weeks after the procedure. The hospital refused to let me stay after 72 hours because I was "just looking for a bed to mooch".
I still feel resentment about this. The main reason being it is 2018, over a decade later, and this is still a common story when it comes to sexual assault and abortions.
I was 14 and homeless. I am First Nations and gender-queer/2S. I didn't have the voice I have now, at 14. So, I never gave them feedback.”
"The nurse gave me an internal exam which confirmed the location of the baby. A doctor then gave me the same exam to reconfirm the location of the baby. Then, a third doctor gave me the same exam yet again, this time without requesting my consent. She was examining me for what seemed like a long time, even joking around with her colleagues while inside of me. I was getting more and more anxious, knowing that this was increasing the risk of infection."
"I woke up from my c-section to be told that I had a boy. They would not answer me as to where he was or if he was okay. I asked at least 3 times. It wasn't until I asked if he was alive that they answered that he was okay"
"My records showed that the doctor had performed a cervix check prior to waking me up to announce me needing a c-section. I have no memory of this cervix check. I was asleep, He apparently requested consent from me while I was asleep."
"Never has anyone treated me like [that doctor] did! I have been the victim of sexual assault in the past, and even that did not compare to how [she] treated me or how it made me feel. I repeatedly asked her to stop the exam, give me a moment, etc., all of which she ignored. She continued forcefully with the exam, while I cried and writhed in agony. "
